Enter Today.

Lyricists! Here’s your chance to shine! Enter The Dallas Songwriters Quarterly Lyric Contest Entry fee is $10 per lyric.

Quarterly Entry Deadlines: Winter - March 31 * Spring - June 30 * Summer - September 30 * Fall - December 31


PRIZES TO BE AWARDED

Of course the MAIN prize is what we ALL aspire to:

RECOGNITION FOR OUR LYRICAL WORK!

ALSO: The 1st place winning lyricist receives:

A certificate, $50 cash and a 1 year DSA membership.

The 1st, 2nd, 3rd place winner's lyrics and judges critiques will be published in the DSA “Songwriters Notes” and on the DSA Website.

Saturday, March 22, 2014

Winners of 2013 Fall Lyric Contest


SEMIFINALISTS
He Didn't Need Much by Dana Young, Anthony, KS
Mr. James Brown and Me by John Thomas Lane, Monument, CO
Three Feet Tall by Bill Kapac, Williamstown, NJ
There's Still Some Cowboy Somewhere in Me by Bill Kapac, Williamstown, NJ
A Whole Lot More Than Strangers by Paul Bernstein, Ann Arbor, MI
The Real Thing by Paul Bernstein, Ann Arbor, MI
Too Late Now by Paul Kostal, Brisbane, Australia
Rambler From Tascosa by Paul Bernstein, Ann Arbor, MI


FIRST PLACE

A WHOLE LOT MORE THAN STRANGERS Paul Bernstein, Ann Arbor, MI
 Judge 1
This is an interesting song and I didn't change much. I'll put in parenthesis what I'm taking out and replacing with another line. I changed a few lines to make meters match.

VERSE 1
The wine was flowing freely
The band was paying loud
I guess it's true that we both knew
What this was all about
Now the party's over
There's no need to pretend
We're a whole lot more than strangers
And a whole lot less than friends

CHORUS
We're a whole lot more than strangers
The way we loved last night
Now I don't know which way to go
Or how to make it right
It's a long, long way from lonely
To get to where we've been
We're a whole lot more than strangers
And a whole lot less than friends

VERSE 2
I watch you move (around) in the room
I watch you brush your hair
And slowly go to pick up clothes
All scattered everywhere
(Could this be the beginning
Or the beginning of the end)
Is this the beginning
Or is this going to end
We're a whole lot more than strangers
And a whole lot less than friends

REPEAT CHORUS

Judge 2
 A country type song with an interesting take on a one night stand situation that make you think about what direction such things might go.  I like the comination of a tongue-in-cheek expression like "we're a whole lot more than strangers" with the expression of sadness of being "a whole lot less than friends" at the same time.  Excellent phrasing and cadence and rhyme scheme, with good originality, emotional impact, appeal, focus and form.

Judge 3
Great use of imagery and phrasing.  

SECOND PLACE

HE DIDN'T NEED MUCH by Dana Young, Anthony, KS
Judge 1
I liked the poetic imagery of this song.

VERSE 1
As I stroll through the graveyard, all is peaceful and quiet
(It puts things in perspective, watching the sunset at twilight)
I gaze at the sky, watch the sunset at twilight
The leaves swirl around in the cool autumn breeze
And I stop at his headstone and drop to my knees

CHORUS
Oh, he didn't need much, just a home and some land
Friends around a campfire and a beer in his hand
He was somebody's son, somebody's brother
He was somebody's hero, and (a country life) somebody's lover

VERSE 2
I used to sit on his porchstep while he strummed his guitar
We'd sip a little Jack from a Mason fruit jar
He liked to watch Gunsmoke with his little old mutt
If he could see me cry now, he'd say ('Hey) "cowboy up"

REPEAT CHORUS

BRIDGE
He never cared much about fortune or fame
He'd say "rich men and poor men, they all bury the same"

REPEAT CHORUS

Judge 2 
 A country style song with excellent phrasing and cadence and rhyme scheme.  Good emotional impact, appeal,focus and form.

THIRD PLACE - TIE

THERE'S STILL SOME COWBOY, SOMEWHERE IN ME by Bill Kapac, Williamstown, NJ

Judge 1
I loved the 1st verse but the 2nd verse needs to stick to the truck theme and the meters don't match. Remember, all the meters in the 2nd and 3rd verse need to match the 1st verse.  It's a cute song, it just needs a little improving.

Judge 2 
Good emotional impact and originality.
Judge 3
Good imagery, form. Like the cowboy wandering theme.

TOO LATE NOW by Paul Kostal, Brisbane, Australia
 Judge 2
A country style song with excellent emotional impact, phrasing and rhyme scheme, good originality.
Judge 3
This song drew me in from the start.  Very realistic subject matter, originality and phrasing as well.

HONORABLE MENTION

THREE FEET TALL by Bill Kapac, Williamstown, NJ
I loved the 1st two lines and think you need to combine those lines with the last 2 lines in the 2nd verse.  Then make this child more interesting in the other verses. The chorus is good but in the last line, change "that's" for "who's"

 Judge 3 
Needs a chorus between vs 1&2…add a bridge?

Thanks to Lyric Contest Director Nancy Rynders and Judges, Michael Brandenberger and Gigi Gostas

1 comment:

vanowjl said...

Are international entries accepted?